Ive left my virginity for you. Ive left my parents home for you. Instead, you listened and you encouraged me to do what I thought might help me. And its from inside that tower I fight and say mean words that feel like stones being pelted at you. You may lose a job, we will lose loved ones, or we might get sick, but through it all, I will always be by your side. And then when we do go out and have fun together, the next day I feel like all of those feelings have been lost again in our daily routine of work and chores around the house. All Rights Reserved. I know that marriages sometimes simply cant work, but doesnt ours at least deserve a chance? Were your one-stop destination for unraveling the mystery that is love. Forgetting the bread will not be the real reason. In the course of helping a depressed wife, you may want to introduce them to a support group if it goes beyond you. Be there for me like you used to be, or dont be with me at all. Because I love you so much, and I want to see you happy. Depression makes me feel tired. "name": "Can A Toxic Marriage Cause Depression? When we got married, it was the happiest day of my life, to make my vows to you and promise to love you forever. There, youll also find thoughts and questions by our community. Even our fights are so passionate that at times when we have differences I choose to fight than remain silent. "@type": "Question", I remember the day we got married, and how . Perhaps there were many reasons behind these changes in our lives, but all I know is that I am unable to live without you by my side anymore! PS: She told Joie Bose after reading the letter her husband was in tears and hugged her tight. I will not sacrifice my sacrifice if you value the worth of my sacrifice. Ive never told you how cold it feels when you look at me like youre looking at a ghost. But I have to tell you the truth about how I feel. Sometimes we just need someone else to make us feel better about ourselves even if theyre not directly involved in our problems at all; just having someone around who cares about us just as much as we care about them goes a long way towards helping us feel better when were feeling down or depressed or frustrated with life in general. Not even because we have a baby together. You knew just how much pain I was in when you found out about my illness but instead of helping me through it all, you left me behind and started a new life without me knowing anything about it at all! How Do I Write A Letter To My Husband About My Feelings? In as much as there should be fun, one should note that marriage goes beyond having fun. Check out ourSubmit a Storypage for more about our submission guidelines. Your email address will not be published. To the contrary, you were always so bright and full of life and energy. You work long hours at work, and when you do come home, all you do is complain about how tired you are. This may however help you both to come to a mutual agreement. Expert Verdict, Should You Contact The Person Your Spouse Is Cheating With The Pros And The Cons, 20 Things That Make Wives Unhappy In A Marriage, 13 Tell-Tale Signs A Man Is Unhappy In His Marriage, 25 Ways To Be A Better Wife And Improve Your Marriage, 9 Important Signs Your Husband Wants To Save The Marriage, 15 Signs Of Emotional Neglect In A Marriage, 20 Ways To Make Your Husband Miss You During Separation, 9 Ways To Deal With Your Husband Not Wanting You 5 Things You Can Do About It, 9 Expert Ways To Stop Your Husband From Yelling At You. And when you view me like that all the time, it hurts me so much. Id lock the memory of you in there for all eternity and let no one come as close to me as you did. This article would guide you as to how to write a letter to your husband as a depressed unhappy wife. Oops! I wanted to express how much I adore and care about you. I wanted to express how much I adore and care about you." Instead of cuddling and watching a movie, we create real-life drama. Im sorry if Ive been mean or angry towards you during these times because its not your fault at all and it was wrong of me to take out my frustrations on you like that. Living with a depressed wife is indeed frustrating. Were stronger together and understand everything about each other. I wonder why the love has started diminishing. You used to show me so much affection, but now I think my own husband is not attracted to me anymore. I have everything I could need: a beautiful baby and a wonderful husband. 4. Vol. It is your duty as a partner to perform these responsibilities. I need you to hold my hand and lead me to the future we planned for us. I never want to be the source of your unhappiness. I know I dont talk about these black clouds often, but I want to. I know sometimes I overreact about the smallest things and get angry, but please be patient with me. An Open Letter to Shitty Husbands, Vol. But Im not guilty of adultery. While your suicidal thoughts have dissipated, I know you constantly think about a day when they might reenter our lives and the home we have made. 2. The distance between us started to widen and our love language changed We barely even talk and I feel neglected and hopeless. You didnt tell me to snap out of it. I wanted you to trust me because I knew I wasnt wrong. I dont want you to feel miserable because of me. "An unhappy marriage chronically feels bad. I need them to be a part of the family we used to be before we even considered having kids. Why are you so insecure of my love for you? We dont do the things we used to do. Communication can break or build up a relationship. I feel so alone and helpless. You mean the world to me and I know its not your fault. I havent self harmed since February 2010, but the urge often consumes me. The whole scene made me sad because it reminded me of how I used to treat my ex-wife. Dont just tell me that Im overreacting and that everythings fine. You hardly ever ask how my day was or what was going on in my life anymore. In the following, we'll be providing a letter to spouse to save marriage. But lately, its like that feeling has been taken from me. I want to work on our relationship but I cant do it alone. This is a letter from a wife to a husband where I talk about years of hurt and pain you have given me. I didnt lie. This world has become too painful for me, and all I can think of is ending it all and leaving behind the pain and suffering so that our kids can be happy again without having to worry about their crazy-depressed mommy anymore. But then, slowly, I started to see the side of you that you were so apt to hide from me and the rest of the world for fear of being found out. But you were still there. Squeeze my hand tight ifyoureawake too. How you deserve better. The following letter samples are compiled for a depressed, unhappy wife to help her describe her situation and express her innermost concealed emotions. Depression always comes with lots of challenges that are sometimes beyond our control. Our chemistry is crazy. As a husband, you may have thoughts of leaving the marriage. "text": "Stress from a toxic relationship can cause a number of symptoms, such as sleep difficulties, appetite changes, and reduced immunity. Maybe its my fault that you dont show affection anymore, but let me try to fix it. This article was originally published on Jan. 8, 2020. Sometimes, I wonder whether youve met someone new, although I still trust you enough to know you wouldnt hurt me that way But maybe Im wrong and youre not the same man I fell in love with all those years ago. How Do You Tell Your Partner You're Depressed. Be a supportive husband. Your mind is elsewhere but my heart is still in your hands. I simply cant handle it because the thought of losing you is killing me. First of all, Im sorry you have to read this letter about feeling unwanted and unloved, but that is how I feel lately. Dont you remember how we used to smile and how carefree we were about what tomorrow could bring? You have been very busy with work lately and spending less time at home with me and the kids. One of the things I care a lot about is humans. We even used to have a rule about not going to bed angry. Research helps you know about depression, its causes, symptoms, and how to treat it. It broke my heart. Seek professional help: A mental health professional can provide a diagnosis and develop a treatment plan tailored to the individuals needs. I'm not happy. Most importantly, I need you to be by my side. You see, the problem is that I am still unhappy and depressed about the way our marriage is going. Please. "@type": "FAQPage", I feel like Im drowning in this marriage, and youre not helping me. Theyd been merelybuzzwords thrown around too many times by peoplewho couldnt think of another way to describe their daily frustrations. There would be an empty place in my heart nothing and no one could fill. Theres so much more ahead of us that we need to face together. This is a very poignant letter written by a wife to a husband, who is insecure, suspicious and has serious trust issues. I hope youre doing well. Click Here To Listen To Free Audiobook On Overcoming Depression. And you had thought it was a boy! And if it ever comes back, I want you to know Ill be here again and again. ] I feel like I cant do anything right anymore. Most of all, I miss you. 4. But know that this time this time I will be ready. The moment the love wavers, trust issues crop up. It doesnt reflect reality at all or at least my reality as a person who wants more out of life than what she has right now (which is exactly nothing). We never go out anymore either because we can never agree on what time or place might be good to go out at. She shares her highs, her lows, the good times, the hysterical times and everything else that goes alongside parenting. But it seems like you dont want that anymore it seems like you dont want me. , { You know that Ive been depressed for a while now and unable to sleep properly. I miss our walks through the park, they were always such a special part of our relationship. Despite the challenges mental illness will no doubt bring to our future, I welcome them head on. Thank you for that. ", Reach out for support: Talking to a therapist, counselor, or trusted friend can help provide a safe space to process and cope with difficult emotions. Maybe I should start by saying that Im sorry. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Open Letter To The Man Who Stopped Loving Me, Heartbreaking Goodbye Letter To A Narcissist. Dont ever stop being the man I love and let me remind you of the woman you once adored. You have changed me from being a happy person to a sad depressed one. I love you so much, and it hurts me to see you like this! I feel lonely and empty inside. You dont seem to notice how unhappy I am, and it makes me feel like you dont care about me as much as you used to. Not a criminal. Maybe we just werent meant for each other after all. Therefore you should know them better as a husband and know when they need love and care. Additionally, Ritual Meditations offers a supportive community of like-minded individuals seeking to find inner peace and a deeper connection with themselves. Think. It was a game we were playing. It's part of my brain chemistry, my DNA, along with a thousand other things about me that you love or that frustrate you. You didnt have to marry me. Our vision is to become a supportive community where youll feel that theres someone out there who gets you, supports you in creating and keeping strong bonds between your families and friends. Im depressed and obviously unhappy. If you feel better without me, my heart would be shattered, but Id be happy for you. I couldnt have ever imagined that being married was like being in a long-distance relationship. I love you so much, but sometimes it feels like we are living separate lives. "We have been married five years, but have no children, only a handsome home. I am writing this letter to you with a heavy heart. I know its hard to help somebodythroughdepression if youve neverexperiencedit yourself. We were so happy back in college, when everything was new and exciting, when our future was bright with possibilities. Please, if you notice the cloud before I tell you, just hug me tight and tell me well fight it together. Heres my letter: Please understand I do love you, as i write this i feel relief and sadness. It is also known as major depressive disorder or clinical depression. Get hand-picked resources and highlights from our Mighty community straight to your inbox. Let us reconnect and strengthen our marriage. When you reached your lowest low, you said something to me I will never be fully equipped to handle. | I feel the cloud approaching and it petrifies me. 2. But whatever the reason for my unhappiness, theres no denying that its real and that it mattersto me and to our marriage. You tell me that you have a lot of work at work and dont have time for me or the kids but its not like that at all. All your life you have given the family the best and if by any case now the business is going down but dear it's not your mistake. 2. I dont know what to do. People even envied our love. Follow this journey on Swords and Snoodles. We havent changed that much and we can change for the better, as long as we stick together. No matter what you decide, writing . Minimizing each other's feelings, having little sex, feeling abandoned and powerless, and no longer having fun together all indicate an unhappy marriage . Please dont give up on me, love, because I wouldnt be the same without you. We used to be able to talk about anything, but now when we sit down together all we do is watch TV or play video games. Im not ready to let go of what we have built together because it means something to me I can only hope that it means something to you too. Let me be a priority to you again and let me show you its worth it. Communicating with your depressed wife helps to free her over-burdened thoughts and also free her mind of some unhealthy thoughts and ideas. Think Aloud is a destination where youll find stories about every step you, as a woman, take. By subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you agree to our. But I want to be happy again, for myself and for you. Im not a thief. I've never told you how cold it feels when you look at me like you're looking at a ghost. But we've been married for more than ten years, and nothing has changed between us. And I know that youve been lying to me. I feel like Im drowning in a sea of my own tears. You were ready to do anything for me, and now Im here asking you to let me do the same for you. } Hed tell me nothing but the truth and the most romantic things I ever heard. When you go through depression while in a marriage, theres a high possibility that you feel unhappy in the marriage and even fall out of love depending on the intensity of the effects the depression may have caused on the marriage. She co-founded Poetry Paradigm and is an executive body member of Indian Performance and Poetry Library. You did this without even giving me an explanation as to why you felt this way and what exactly made you think that ending our marriage would be best for both of us? Even if you dont want me anymore, I want you to want me. I used to be so happy when we were first married but now everything has changed and it feels like we are just roommates living under the same roof instead of husband and wife who should love each other unconditionally no matter what happens! Click here to learn more. The Mighty is asking the following:Write a letter to anyone you wish had a better understanding of your experience with disability, disease or mental illness. Dont give up on our marriage. To the spouse who wants out . A truly unenviable position for any new husband. On weekends, all we do is sit around watching TV together as a family when we should be doing something fun together as a family instead of just sitting around like zombies! I know that you would do anything for me. Leading up to our wedding and even a few months past it, I felt absolutely immobilized. I wanted to express how much I adore and care about you. I want to be your partner in crime and the best friend you can tell anything to. 3. Build that home with me by rebuilding our bond. But weve been married for more than ten years, and nothing has changed between us. Because I'm tired of all the things we leave unsaid. Im sorry for hurting you, for the fights we have and for not being the wife you need me to be. This can be made very simple. "acceptedAnswer": { Symptoms of depression can however interfere with your marriage and prevent you from performing your responsibilities as a wife or husband. I hope I did a good job of supporting you and loving you through it. You say that I need to be more patient but how can I be when things keep going wrong? Ever. It feels like we have lost our connection with each other and there isnt anything left between us anymore except for our daughter who sleeps in her own room at night while we sit on opposite ends of our king size bed watching TV shows. I dont know what happened, but maybe its time for both of us to start working on the marriage again instead of just living our lives separately and not really talking about anything important anymore. You can find even more stories on our Home page. (Insert husband's name or nickname here), I'm writing you this letter to express my feelings. Because, lets face it, thats what weve really been yelling for. We used to have our own love language that would melt my heart and make me dream of you. I am writing this letter to you because I need to tell you how I feel. Encourage them even as they are putting in their little effort. Today, I am a man. A year ago, our marriage was perfect. I will get through this with the help of a little medication and some therapy. 3. Thank you for fulfilling my random cravings because you know it will make me feel better. You can find even more stories on our Home page. And I did it all with love. Dont doubt me, dear. Love to read and write. Join ourLets Talk Depressiongroup to get advice from people whove been there. She was speaking to me in a male voice. Thank you so much for this! Tips And Coping Advice, 13 Common Things Husbands Do To Destroy Their Marriage. This can reflect some change patterns in the marriage making it possible to fall out of love. Take care of yourself: Caring for your own well-being will enable you to better support your wife. We yell at each other and pretend that its about whatever trivial thing we are yelling about. Help me make things better again. We share subjects that impact your daily life and we primarily discuss and write about all things related to relationships, breakups, mental health, astrology and much more. I want us to be happy again please help me make this happen by making an effort with me! I know that no one can take away all the happiness from your life except yourself but please stop blaming me for everything that goes wrong between us because I dont want any more fights or arguments between us anymore! I wanted so badly for things to work out between us, but it hasnt happened yet. Not to see you suffer or walk through my shoes, but to have a chance to show you that I will always be there for you, too. It hurts so much because I am so in love with my husband. The thing is, I love you so much. Problem solver and a personal counselor. I know it can add up quickly. When we first met, Id never beentruly close to a person whosuffered from long-term anxiety and severe depression. I shouldnt feel unwanted by the man I planned to spend the rest of my life with. When I look into the mirror, I see an old woman instead of a young girl like before. I feel so alone, so unhappy. I can see that you dont see the woman you fell in love with when you look at me, and that hurts. And when I say Ill divorce you, its the last thing I want to do. Instead, I dont even feel loved by you. } Its like an old addiction that comes to hurt me when it smells the dark cloud. An Open Letter to My Spouse Struggling with Depression. You hardly ever spend time with me anymore and when we are together it is always work related conversations or about the kids, or about other peoples problems. It likely involves a number of factors, including brain chemistry, hormones and life experiences. 2. Im sorry that I am not the wife you deserve but I dont know what else to do. Changes in appetite, loss of appetite, and weight loss. Were meant to be best friends and lovers. I hope that this letter finds you well and happy with your new life without me. I should acknowledge I don't know the details. That there was nothing I could do to be a better husband or companion and help your sadness and anxiety go away and that, yes, you were crying, but it was nothing I had done. We hardly ever talk anymore, except when were fighting or yelling at each other (which is often). I love our children more than anything, but sometimes I feel like a failure. I feel so lonely and sad all the time. You dont have time for me anymore. The truth is that Im not happy anymoreand I dont think I have been for a long time. "acceptedAnswer": { After all weve been through, I think it does and Ive started feeling like its not an option youd consider anymore. Thank you for the times you let me make those big decisions for my mental health. I find it so hard being a momma on cloudy days, but I try so hard to not let them notice the clouds. Becci is a 31-year-old mum to two young boys. Related Reading: My Boyfriend Is Jealous And Calls Me 50 Times A Day. The woman on the other side. Her. Oops! And thats not something that should be mentioned more than once. And my husband is always kind and good, but I think I am neglected! I love you so much and I just want to make you happy. Relief that i can express what's been kept inside and sadness because i know that you seeing this will hurt you. Our love will always be my favorite melody, but it takes two to tango. She spent her 20's travelling, her 30's getting married and having babies, and is now hitting her 40's newly . This Sex Therapist Explains Why She Makes Out With Her Husband Every. I think Im going to have a panic attack. or Oh my gosh, Im so depressed became a monotonous phrase that strangers were all too happy to proclaim when the coffee shop ran out of their favorite muffin or they were forced to stay in the library a little later than normal to finish a paper instead of going to the bars with their friends. I was ready to give in to whatever you wanted, even if those tendencies were reckless or self-destructive. You spend more and more time away from me and the children. Weve come a long way. Categories A letter to someone who hurt you, Read This If You Have Difficulty Getting Over An Almost Relationship. 2022. I try to hide it from you because I dont want to worry you, but its been getting harder and harder to keep up the faade. Were not together anymore because you decided that you didnt want me anymore and decided that it was time for us to go our separate ways. I want things to get better, i want to be your wife and your friend and I want to feel like I'm as important as everything else in your . Did I do something to you that caused things to be this way? But I want you to know that I am here for you, and that when things get tough, I'll be there in spirit. The Mighty is asking the following: Write a letter to anyone you wish had a better understanding of your experience with disability, disease or mental illness. But I have been depressed for a long time now and I dont think you understand why. And its not just because youve been there for me, but because I love you and want to be with you at any cost. But I have to believe were together for a reason. Im going to sit down and write mine today. 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. 1. Im so used to the way you make me feellike everything is okay and I can do anything. You are not happy anymore and neither do I feel happy living with you anymore. Thank you for funding my therapy, doctors appointments, and medications. I dont know what to do. You may want to tell your husband what you feel nicely and decently. It was not my intention to hurt you. 13 Tell-Tale Signs A Man Is Unhappy . I didnt show because I wanted you to trust me. I have been feeling very depressed lately. That is enough for me. This letter is my last chance to show him how alone I really feel So here goes. Im sorry you get thebrunt of my anger on cloudydays. I know that you are a good person who always tries his best but sometimes life just sucks and theres nothing anyone can do about it. A woman who needs a letter to explain her feelings to her spouse to finally admit the truth to herself: My husband doesnt want me anymore. Whats tearing us apart, making us seem so far away from each other even on those rare occasions when we hug? In a word, I felt helpless. September 10, 2022 November 2, 2022. When the black cloud is here it consumes my mind. And Ive left my identity to become your wife. I hope you know I try. When we first met, I thought you were different. Im feeling so broken and lost. Separation is not an option, if you ask me, but feeling alone in a marriage shouldnt be an option either. Just tell me you love me and leave me to calm down. I hope that you could still feel that way about me too. Just like you have always been there for me, I will always be there for you. When we first met, I thought that was it: You were the one for me! But purely surviving and actually living are not the same, and I dont want to merely survive without you. I guess what Im trying to say here is that something needs to change. I dont know where to start but it all started when we moved here.